We Just Dont Get on!!!!

  • Blake J Askew

    Actor

    Hi all,

    I thought it would be quite interesting to start a thread about that one subject that NO ONE has yet broached-

    our relationships to other actors.

    This is the place to share stories and thoughts why actors do or do not get on. Just dont mention the show you did or the actors name if you have a negative experience because that would be really nasty and the thread would get closed.

    • 17th Mar 2007
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  • Fiona Cuskelly

    Actor

    Sounds like you have a juicy story you're dying to share Blake. Spit it out and get the ball rolling.

    • 14th Feb 2007
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  • Blake J Askew

    Actor

    Well, this story is from South Africa, so I can be a bit more open about it.

    did my first job and the one actress in my show was one of biggest divas I have ever worked with in my life. She was rumoured to be ill one day and I mentioned in passing that she seemed okay when I last saw her, when management asked me. Big mistake!!!!!!

    She was a few years older than me and screamed and screamed and screamed. Why? Just because I said she seemed well when she felt ill.

    Then there was the actress who directed me ON STAGE!!!!!! This has happened in SA and in the UK.

    I also heard about a well known actress who wanted to actually KILL her male costar- I am serious- KILL. A well known vocal coach who is a friend told me about this. I asked him why actors seem to hate each other all the time-

    he simply said; Passion.

    I am tempted to agree. We are all so up ourselves, that we take everything too seriously.

    • 14th Feb 2007
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  • Sally Beaumont

    Actor

    Initial caveat: I get on well with most other actors, and generally they are lovely people.

    OK.

    I worked on a low budget horror film with an actor who, on first meeting me (just shook hands) leant over to the director and said "I can see why you cast her!".

    Then spent the rest of the rehearsal bursting into laughter, because in an argument scene "you really seem angry with me!" (it's called acting, darling).

    The final straw came when he started to tell the director what to do, ignored the script (he couldn't remember it) and then every scene we were in the same shot he'd push my face into his chest (I was supposed to be frightened) so the camera could only see him!!!

    In the end the crew ganged up on him, gave him an earful, and he was gently let go.

    I worked with another actor who refused to take direction before he'd learnt the lines, only learnt the lines on the dress rehearsal, and then declared it was "too late to direct me, I've learnt them a specific way". Admitedly not a direct conflict of personalities, but we all wanted to murder him.

    Anyone else?

    I played Hamlet once with another actor who'd also auditioned for the role. She was the gravedigger and spent rehearsals teasing me about my chest size (I was playing a man!) and talked over me during the performances-i.e. just didn't stop. I think she also lobbed the skull at my head.

    Great times.

    • 14th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    I've found most actors I've worked with to be very decent human beings. Yes, I've experienced bitchiness, raging egomania, desperation to please etc etc but on the whole I think if you enter into your acting with a spirit of generosity, you'll meet with the same. Do as you would be done by and all that.

    I've also found the best actors I've worked with are actually the nicest people. Maybe I've just been lucky!

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    I think it's mostly down to Competition and plain old jealousy (crikey I sound like my mum!) we are all in competition with each other and so are constantly trying to outdo one another.

    And at the risk of starting a fight, I'm afraid girlies that we are the worst! Most actresses will eye each other up and down then go in with a bitchy comment or a snub. They've never met you , have no idea what your like but are rude to you anyhow - what a waste of energy!

    The worst experience I ever had was down to jealousy; I was ganged up on by 3 other actresses who proceeded to make my life hell all because I'd been mentioned in the review; the fact that my character was integral to the plot and therefore HAD to be mentioned was neither here nor there. Everyone knew but the director wouldn't do anything because the girl who was instegating it all was the lead.

    Oh happy days......

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • Tony Symonds

    Actor

    I have cast 7 actors from this site for my short film; "The Last October."

    Joseph Steyne, Samantha Dale, Evan Locke, David Lockwood, Elizabeth Dive, John Sullivan and Ioan Jones.

    Every single one got on well with me, each other, the rest of the crew, and the extras.

    And to boot every single was very talented. I think its not hard to get on with people, and if you have problems its either you or them. If you dont get on with many people, it's probably you.

    :)

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    I've had very few problems.

    When I first started doing press I represented a few high profile-ish models who were all nightmares towards me and everyone else.

    Had a "cull" of clients and have been pretty much OK.

    Its interesting how the ones with the talent are rarely a problem.

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    my rant and rave involves actors who are just actors.By that I mean, people who can only talk,think and breathe acting.I know that we need dedication love and sheer guts to be actors.but i also like to have a life,and a personality. One particular person i worked with is a prime example. Hes the type of person who youd see in the street and say "how are you.." and they would reply by a verbal rendition of their cv! If all I did was live and breathe acting i think id go insane, everyone needs to come away from it every now and again and just take check of whats important,as soon as you forget that,your done for as far as im concerned.

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    Your never going to get on with everyone you meet its just not human nature! I think not getting on with people happens regardless of what career you persue. It just seems more obvious in our industry because of the way we are. To get any where we have to fight for it, compete, run circles round each other to get noticed - and thats always going to be a factor. At the end of the day you put up with people you dont like for the sake of your work. And the people you do like? well thats bloody great cause its hard to find real friends in what is such a fickle industry.

    • 15th Feb 2007
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  • Blake J Askew

    Actor

    Steph,

    I think its spot on what you say. I mean, I can get on PROFESSIONALLY with people and amicably enough to have a reasonably good working relationship, but I have also realised that they are not friends necessarily.

    Also, everyone is nice to start with, but just wait until you are in a tour annoying each other- then its a bit harder.

    We dont have to like everyone, or get on personally- it certainly helps a LOT, but we need to get on enough to be able to work well together.

    To think we have to always get on with everyone can lead to people becoming people pleasers- and THAT is incredibly common in our industry, and people "get on" just to fit in etc.

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    Sorry to be boring but I have to say that I have been really lucky and made some amazing, long lasting friendships that bridge time and distance through the productions I have worked on thus far in my career and I have never had a bad experience with my fellow actors. Maybe I've just been incredibly lucky, I don't know but I've loved every minute of working in this industry with some fatastic people who I hope will remain in my life for many years to come.

    Ask me the same question in ten years and maybe my answer will be different...but I really hope not.

    Have a great day

    Sasha

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • Joseph Steyne

    Actor

    Cheers Tony!

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    I completely agree with Steph - it's what I was trying to say but better put!

    I know I had a rant about my 'bad experience' earlier but I have to point out it was only ONE, all the other actors I've ever worked with have been lovely people. I agree with the point made earlier that usually the more talented the actor, the nicer they are (not to mention easier to work with) and I'm lucky to have worked with some really talented people.

    K x

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • User Deleted

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    yeah, i mean im only just starting out but luckily in the few jobs ive had everyone was really nice. Im sure there will be a day when someone annoys me though lol!

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • Nathan Head

    Actor

    ive never really worked with an actor/actress i didnt like. i got on with most of them pretty well, and stayed in touch with a few.

    • 16th Feb 2007
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  • Leila Reid

    Actor

    I have to say i'm with Kareen on this one I think they get jealous when they see you playing the part that they went up for and think why did she get it and not me.

    I do get on with 99.9% of my fellows actors your such niece people who can help you with everything what I can't stand are the one that are incapable of talking about anything but themselves and what they have been doing and the ones who think they are better then the director!

    apart from thoose two u guys are great!

    Leila

    • 18th Feb 2007
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  • Nathan Head

    Actor

    i know just what you mean Leila, ive come across actors like that before! lol

    but i still get on with them. Lol

    (incidentally, i actually dont like talking about what ive done, i get all self concious. even more if they know the show i am on about.)

    • 19th Feb 2007
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  • Janine Robins

    Actor

    Hi all, I think it is very true that you can't get on with everyone. What would be nice though is that if you don't like someone - don't show it, just be polite and get on with the job. I think it is just bad manners to be bitchy. Courtesy costs nothing after all.

    • 19th Feb 2007
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  • Blake J Askew

    Actor

    I do think there is a differenc ethough to GETTING on personally, and professionally, though.

    there is never an excuse for bitchy, histrionic behavior, backbiting or gossip. But its good to be professioanl, courteous and respectful of the person , while knowing you may nt be great friends. it helps to be honest though.

    And Leila, get used to it- jealousy is sadly a big part of this business and just walk with your head up high- you dont have to apologise for winning a job, just obviously dont rub it in their faces, but its THEIR problem if they are jealous- not yours.

    • 19th Feb 2007
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