No actor is immune to rejection from auditions. From those at the very start of their careers who are trying to get into drama school or land their first job to more seasoned performers with their sights fixed on their dream role, audition rejection is part and parcel of being an actor.
Sometimes a no may come at the first stage of the casting process, whereas other times it will come after multiple auditions, when significant effort and emotion have been invested. That was certainly the case for actor Amanda Seyfried, who auditioned six times to play Glinda in the Wicked films.
It can vary widely. Sometimes there will be an audition rejection email, which may be a blanket message sent to all unsuccessful applicants or a message with more personalised feedback.
Despite the Equity union long campaigning for actors to receive at least a yes-or-no response to auditions, however, more often than not, there is no audition rejection letter at all.
Instead, rejection most commonly comes in the form of silence. Actor, producer, and screenwriter Jade Asha says rejection most often means “being ignored, sometimes ghosted, every so often a polite email.” Actor Alexa Morden agrees, adding: “Working predominantly in TV and film means you rarely experience explicit rejection. It’s more often radio silence. You send self-tapes into the abyss and never hear back.”
Morden, who is also a podcaster, acting coach, author, and industry advocate, says it can be demoralising, which is why it is important to find coping strategies.
1. Acknowledge and let go of what is outside of your control.
Of course, it is important to reflect on what you may do differently, learn from past mistakes, and continue to hone your audition and acting technique. There are, however, likely to be many cases in which you did the best you could in the circumstances you had.
It’s important to recognise that there is so much about an audition that you cannot control: who else is auditioning, how the director imagines the character, who else has already been cast in the roles opposite the one you are auditioning for, and so on.
“The predominant reason [outside the actor’s control] that an actor might not get the role is that the director had a vision and someone else suits that vision better,” says casting director Sophie Holland. “It’s a sad truth in this industry that the best actor doesn’t always get the role.”
2. Allow yourself to feel grief, anger, and sadness over the audition rejection.
There is no right or wrong way to feel after not landing a role, and it is important to give nonjudgemental space to whatever emotions come up. After all, a huge part of being an actor is vulnerability, and feeling sadness over an audition rejection only shows how much you care about your art.
“It’s OK to grieve a job,” Holland says. “It means you put yourself out there, that you tried.”
Actor Scarlett Maltman, who co-founded arts mental health charity Industry Minds, advises to “allow yourself to sit with the emotions and feel the loss – that might be the loss of income, how you saw your future, your place in the industry. Suppressing the emotions around rejection can lead to shame and perhaps unhelpful coping mechanisms.”
It is important, however, not to dwell on the rejection for too long, otherwise it can turn into unhealthy rumination. Actor, director, and educator Christy Arington recommends giving yourself a day to feel the feelings.
3. Talk it through.
Hop on the phone or grab a coffee with other actor friends, Asha says. “It’s nice to get it off your chest and be reminded of how wonderful you are,” she says. Your friends will all have been through the same thing at one point or another, and they will be able to empathise.
4. Remember to practise self-care and self-compassion.
Sometimes the simple things may help. “Don’t forget the basics, such as sleep, eating healthily, and gentle exercise,” Maltman says. It’s also important to practise self-compassion, which means not beating yourself up over an audition you feel you could have done differently or better. It could also be doing something nice for yourself after receiving the rejection, in the same way you may look after a friend who has just gone through a breakup.
Maltman also advises temporarily stepping away from industry-related social media if seeing other people posting about audition successes may feed into the pain of rejection.
5. Make sure you have mental health support in place.
When an individual’s sense of self-worth is so intensely tied up with their identity as an actor, continuous rejection can lead to deeper mental health issues, Maltman says. That may include self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and depression.
If the emotional toll of audition rejection becomes overwhelming, seek professional help, advises mental health organisation 6ftfromthespotlight.
6. Find other creative outlets and nurture your life outside of acting.
“It’s so important to have multiple artistic outlets, professional endeavours, and creative hobbies, so your entire sense of worth isn’t resting on audition outcomes,” Morden says.
6ftfromthespotlight recommends diversifying your efforts within the industry. If you’re an actor, for example, exploring writing, directing, or producing could lead to new skills and keep your passion fresh.
7. Reframe your mindset toward auditioning.
Perhaps you don’t need to perceive audition rejection as rejection at all. Rejection takes the form we give it, says agent and life and career coach Mildred Yuan. “Some people take not receiving an answer to a cold email as rejection, and, for others, even not getting a job when they’ve got down to the final few doesn’t feel like rejection, but a realignment,” Yuan says.
“We all have so much to offer, but just because someone isn’t taking up our offer at this time does not mean that we are worthless or that what we have to offer is not valuable in a different context,” Yuan adds.
Actor Darren Darnborough uses the analogy of a florist. Like a florist, he says, an actor must work to put their talents – their flowers – on display every day. A potential customer – a director – may walk past the shop every day without buying the flowers, until they need them for a specific occasion.
Actor Bryan Cranston has spoken about viewing auditioning as the job itself, and seeing it as “another opportunity to act,” rather than as a job interview.
8. Focus on the things that are within your control for the next audition.
After reflecting on your audition and processing any feelings caused by the rejection, it’s time to refocus your mind on the present moment and on what you can do now to prepare for your next audition – because that’s now the one that counts.